Tuesday, March 5, 2013

Learning for life, the Finnish way

文章标题:Learning for life, the Finnish way
文章作者:Ng Jing Yng
发表日期:2013年3月5日
发表媒体:《今日报Today

No tuition, only one major exam (with six hours given per paper) and classes that mix kids of all abilities. We discover how they do it, in our two-part special report.


Mention private tuition, and one gets a bemused look from Finnish educators, pupils and parents. This is unheard of in their country, they say. When school ends, so do the lessons.

Once bell rings at 2pm across schools in Finland, children run to the park to indulge in snowball fights or pastimes like ice hockey and music. The only group missing out on the fun, when TODAY visited last month shortly before the matriculation exam (the only national assessment in Finland), were the 18-year-olds, who duly trooped home to revise.

Mr Juha Korhonen, who has three children, did not know of any tuition programmes in Finland. “Even if there were, I wouldn’t send my kids … Children need free time and rest after school and homework,” he said.

Homework for Finnish students consists of a few Math problems or perhaps essay assignments. For the minority who have trouble keeping up, teachers provide remedial lessons after school.

As Professor Jouni Valijarvi, an expert in international tests such as the Programme for International Student Assessment (PISA), notes: “In Finland, school is the only place where students study.” This has been the tradition, said the Director of Finnish Institute for Educational Research: “Children mark a very clear difference between school time and their free time.”

Even the after-school sports or arts activities that students engage in — and which are managed by private or community organisations — are clearly treated as hobbies, and not the mandated co-curricular activities of Singapore schools.

Hanna Korhonen, 13, trains in figure skating because “I enjoy it very much and I hope to be a professional skater someday”.

EAT, NAP, THINK IN 6 HOURS

Meanwhile, Emmi Siitonen was preparing for the first major exam of her life when TODAY met her.

The 18-year-old had practised mock exam scenarios set by her teachers and previous years’ papers. She was still feeling nervous, but at least she was certain she would have enough time to finish the matriculation exam — which allocates six hours per paper (most pupils sit for six subjects).

Said Emmi: “I have the time to think and write my answers … after all, the exams are not about memorising but to test my understanding and ability to apply knowledge.”

During the six-hour-long sittings, most schools even provide sandwiches and juices. “There is no hurry, you can think, you have a short nap, drink your coffee and eat your lunch, before completing the paper,” said language teacher Katrina Vartiainen. While most of her pupils can complete a paper in four hours, she said the time allows weaker students to do their best as well.

There are no national exams during the first nine years of a student’s life in comprehensive schools. Out of each cohort of 60,000 students, about 30,000 go on to upper secondary education, where their ultimate aim is to do well in the matriculation exam which they sit for in two or three years.

The other half of the cohort enters vocational schools or starts work. Entrance to upper secondary is dependent on their Grade Point Average at the end of Grade Nine (the equivalent of Secondary 3). Both vocational and upper secondary schooling can lead to a university education.

While Emmi certainly felt the stress of having to prepare for the matriculation exam, she said upper secondary school — which operates on a modular system — has taught her to take charge of her own education. Pupils are given the flexibility to customise their own timetable across interests such as German Language or Philosophy.

Educators note that the matriculation exam weighs heavily on students and parents’ minds — not too different from major exams here in Singapore. While the nation’s top scorer is not publicly announced, there are still informal rankings compiled by the media. This may perpetuate the reputation of “top” schools and enable them to attract high-performing students, educators add.

ENSURING QUALITY TEACHING

In the 1960s, the Finnish authorities decided to implement a compulsory nine-year education path, providing free education for children between seven and 16 years of age.

Pupils attend comprehensive schools nearest to their homes, in part due to the authorities guaranteeing children in the neighbourhood a place. Most parents interviewed also believe that all schools are equally good.

To ensure the quality of education in schools, the Finnish National Board of Education randomly selects schools every few years to conduct assessments. Language associations helmed by teachers also regularly carry out voluntary tests among pupils.

In the classrooms, teachers use a variety of tests and quizzes as well as provide regular feedback to help students manage their learning process. They follow a national curriculum highlighting key areas to be covered, but can decide how they want to teach and assess students.

For instance, teachers could hold two class tests counting to the final grade, while giving quizzes after each topic is taught. At the same time, they pay attention to how pupils participate in class, recording their observations almost daily in an online system.

Both parents and students can access the system. Said 17-year-old student Linh Lin: “There are tests and self-evaluations; this pressure is enough to motivate me. My parents also always emphasise the importance of getting good grades.”

And without major exams every few years, Finnish educators noted another benefit: They can tailor lessons according to pupils’ pace of learning, allocating time for field trips and frequent group activities.

“The younger kids need a relaxed learning atmosphere, and that cannot happen with high-stakes exams,” said Mr Olli Maatta, who teaches at Helsinki Normal Lyceum. “It would also limit teaching as you would only teach what is tested; learning is narrowed due to this fear of the exams.”

Maininki School principal Rolf Malmelin agreed that schools are not just places of study, but also for children to learn how to live and work with others in society. “When you are not just teaching for the national tests, you are teaching the kids for life,” he added.

EQUALITY AND INCLUSIVENESS

One way to learn for life, according to students and educators, is the inclusive study environment in Finnish schools.

There is no best class; kids of different abilities are grouped together. A special needs teacher steps into the classroom to assist special needs learners or brings them to another classroom for a few periods each day. (In 2011, 11.4 per cent of comprehensive school pupils received some kind of special support.)

Joao Hamalainen, 17, studies in one of Helsinki’s elite upper secondary school, the Helsinki Normal Lyceum (Most students enter with a Grade Point Average of 9.0 upon 10).

Of his first nine years of school-life, he said: “Being with classmates of different abilities guided me more. For subjects I am better at, I learned by helping my classmates.”

Nevertheless, while international tests show that Finnish pupils are performing well and the variance between Finnish schools is small, some observers have argued that smarter learners are not stretched to their fullest potential.

Ms Armi Mikkola, Counsellor of Education at the Finland Ministry of Education and Culture, explained that equality underscores the Finnish education system. Huge investments are chanelled to support pupils with special needs. “Our system believes in providing equal education opportunities, where schools do not select students,” she said.

TODAY visited an English Language class at Maininki School, half an hour from Helsinki. Teacher Rose-Marie Mod-Sandberg posed questions and got her eighth-grade class of 14-year-olds to discuss in pairs. Next, she gave out vocabulary exercises, assigning additional questions to one or two of the faster learners.

Ms Mod-Sandberg agreed that managing a heterogeneous classroom is tricky. “Sometimes, I feel bad that a lot of attention is paid to the slowest ones … the really clever ones, they don’t always get enough.” To make up for that, teachers use diverse ways, including challenging quicker students with more demanding tasks, or grouping pupils so that they help each other.

Although managing these differences might mean more work for them, teachers baulk at the suggestion of streaming students according to abilities. Said Mr Maatta: “We are not for helping only the talented thrive… In the classroom, everyone is lifted up to a certain level.”

THREATS AND HURDLES

The uncertain European economy, however, may be threatening the future success of Finland’s education system. City officials seeking to cut costs might decide to reduce education spending, arguing that Finnish students are already scoring well in international tests, noted Prof Valijarvi of the Finnish Institute for Educational Research.

Last month, for example, the authorities from Jyvaskyla city decided to relocate Jyvaskylan Lyseon lukio — one of Finland’s oldest upper secondary schools — in order to potentially set up a larger high school. The savings on building maintenance costs were cited as a reason by local media.

But this is no time to rest on laurels — as Prof Valijarvi noted, schools are facing emerging challenges, such as the growing number of special needs and immigrant children, who need more attention. And with individual municipalities having autonomy on spending, the richer municipalities would be better able to invest more in schools — jeopardising Finland’s tradition of equal opportunities across the country, he added.

There is also a need to use technology more pervasively in Finnish classrooms, said University of Helsinki head of teacher education Jari Lavonen. “That’s a real challenge ... There are lots of success stories, but not in every classroom.”

And in an increasingly educated society, educators are reporting a trend of demanding Finnish parents.

While teachers have long been highly-respected in Finland, of late there have been lawsuits brought by parents against schools, and parents who question teaching methods.

To manage the shifting education landscape, educators highlight the need to better train school leaders to manage teachers’ welfare. Ramping up in-service training opportunities is also crucial to help teachers keep up with changes, they note.

Finnish parents told TODAY that they still trust teachers, but busier lifestyles have also led to higher expectations of educators. They urged the Finnish authorities to support teachers by keeping watch on expanding class sizes and investing more in special needs pupils.


(Sidebar)
FINNISH EDUCATION
FINLAND FACTS
• GDP in 2011: US$263 billion (S$328 billion)
• Education spending in 2011: 6.6% of GDP
• Average class size: 20

AT A GLANCE
• Free compulsory education from Grades One to Nine (7 to 16 years old)
• No national examinations in the first nine years; teachers use class tests and self-evaluations
• After Grade Nine, students proceed to Upper Secondary schools or vocational institutes or workforce
• Matriculation exam, taken by 18 to 19 year olds, at the end of upper secondary

CHALLENGES FACED
• Uncertain economy and spending cuts
• Rising number of special needs and immigrant children
• More demanding parents
• Implementing use of ICT across all schools

2009 PISA RESULTS
• Reading: 3rd place (Singapore 5th place)
• Mathematics: 6th place (Singapore 2nd place)
• Science: 2nd place (Singapore 4th place)

Source: Finland Ministry of Education and Culture, World Bank, OECD


(Sidebar)
PRE-SCHOOL: WHERE KIDS ARE LEFT TO BE KIDS
Putting on another layer of outer wear, head teacher Linda Loh-Tammila heads outdoors with her group of 30 pre-schoolers, a daily activity she has yet to get used to.

The Singaporean, who has been living in Finland for three years, shivers in the sub-zero temperatures while her pupils romp the snowy park grounds.

“When the parents come to pick their kids up, they ask whether their child has been outside to play today, not about what was taught in class,” said Mrs Loh-Tammila.

Hence, in her pre-school that caters to children ranging in age from three to six, the daily timetable includes at least two hours of outdoor play.

Mrs Loh-Tammila, 49, who is married to a Finn and has two teenage children, used to help a friend run a pre-school when her husband was stationed in Japan. She enjoyed the experience so much that she studied for a certificate in Montessori teaching and obtained qualifications to teach English as a foreign language.

After moving to Finland, she found a job with Fountain Square Playschool, an English Language private pre-school in Espoo, which is 30 minutes from Helsinki.

The former luxury goods brand manager said that in Finland, “children are left to enjoy being children”.

Finnish parents, both of whom usually work, turn to pre-schools for their child to be taken care of and to socialise with other children, she said. Pre-school education is not compulsory — formal schooling starts at Grade One (equivalent of Primary 1) — but 99 per cent of children attend pre-schools run by the government or private operators.

All Finnish pre-school teachers must obtain a university degree specialising in early childhood education, and there are curriculum guidelines for pre-school education. Pre-schools set goals such as having their charges counting up to 20 by the age of six.

Nevertheless, a child who does not attend pre-school doesn’t miss out by much, as the same things are taught again in Grade One, noted Ms Raija Ikaheimo, who also teaches at Fountain Square Playschool. “The main focus of pre-school here is for children to be able to be friends … things like letters and numbers, that isn’t as important”.


Ng Jing Yng is a senior reporter with TODAY covering the education beat. She spent one and a half weeks visiting schools in three Finnish cities — Helsinki, Jyvaskyla and Turku — ranging from primary through to upper secondary (JC equivalent) levels. She spoke to students, educators, university faculty who train teachers and officials.

Monday, March 4, 2013

In teachers they trust

文章标题:In teachers they trust
文章作者:Ng Jing Yng
发表日期:2013年3月4日
发表媒体:《今日报Today

Every Finnish school is a good school, because every teacher is highly-trained and qualified. In a two-part special report, we look at the secrets of Finland’s education model.


Asked how he assesses his teachers, Mr Matti Koivusalo shrugs matter-of-factly that he has “no means” to do so. “There is no evaluation whatsoever for teachers. Everything is based on trust,” says the Principal of Haaga Comprehensive School in Helsinki.

Indeed, the “open” school culture means any feedback quickly reaches his ears, says Mr Koivusalo, who looks after 50 teachers and 600 pupils in grades one through nine (the equivalent of Primary 1 to Secondary 3 in Singapore).

It is easy to see how: Along the school’s hallway, pupils look up from their mobile phones and greet him as he walks past; some engage him in friendly banter. At the school cafeteria where free lunches are served daily — an established practice at all Finnish schools — teachers join him for lunch and chat about how their day has gone.

Said Mr Koivusalo: “If something bad happens, I’ll hear about it in five minutes … The atmosphere is such that (students and teachers) can come and talk about it freely without being afraid.”

Even so, sackings are rare in Finnish schools, say educators. Mr Vesa Valkila, one of the principals at Turku University teacher training school, tried to explain: “Finnish teachers have a lot of freedom and are trusted … that really motivates a lot of them to do their best.”

LEFT TO TEACH

In Finland, a small country of 5.4 million people, its education system operates on this singular principle of trust.

The country’s model shot to global attention after Finnish pupils repeatedly excelled in international tests such as the Programme for International Student Assessment — despite having practically no mandated standardised exams, rankings or competition.

Schools take in students of all varying abilities, including those with learning disabilities, under one roof. The curious result is that, the differences between its weakest and strongest students are the smallest in the world, according to a Organisation for Economic Co-operation and Development (OECD) survey.

School leaders across Finland tell TODAY the same thing: “We trust our teachers”.

There are no national examinations in the first nine years of Finnish formal schooling, and schools and teachers are pretty much left on their own to educate their charges.

As Ms Armi Mikkola, counsellor of education at the Ministry of Education and Culture put it: “The administration is for support and not for inspection … Trust is part of Finnish society, it is a culture.”

Nevertheless, “with trust, there are some risks”, admitted Professor Jouni Valijarvi, Director of the Finnish Institute for Educational Research.

To mitigate risks of having underperforming teachers in schools, a stringent teacher selection process and rigorous teacher training is integral to the system, he said. “It is very important that we can say all schools are good schools,” added Prof Valijarvi. “Because in every school, we’ve highly-trained and qualified teachers”.

SELECTING THE VERY BEST

Yearly, 7,000 teaching aspirants apply to be class teachers (teaching the equivalent of Primary 1 to 6). Typically, there are just 800 spots available.

To teach secondary and upper secondary students (Secondary 1 to Junior College equivalent), 6,000 vie for 1,500 subject teacher positions yearly. Universities cherry-pick from this large pool of applicants, with two different selection processes for each category.

For class teachers, to prepare applicants for an entrance test, authorities will release study materials online on education-related topics such as pedagogical research studies. During the four-hour test, applicants answer about 100 multiple-choice questions. Even so, acing the entrance test does not guarantee a spot in one of the 11 universities offering teacher education.

In phase two, depending on the applicant’s university of choice (they are given up to three picks), there could be a psychometric test along with an interview, or an observed group activity. Some universities also select based on an applicant’s matriculation exam results — the only national examinations taken by Finnish pupils, at the age of 18.

Ms Anna Vaatainen, a student teacher at the University of Turku, is one who succeeded on her second try.

In her first attempt, she was invited by the University of Jyvaskyla for an interview but did not make it through. She went on to obtain a social work degree, and worked in an orphanage for four months, before deciding to give teacher education another go.

This time, after “studying very hard” for the entrance test again, she and three other applicants were tasked by the University of Turku to plan an imaginary school’s sports day. “I am better around people so this group activity might have worked for me,” she said.

Those hoping to be a subject teacher undergo a similar selection process, having to first pass an entrance test set by their subject faculty of choice. They will then apply to the faculty of education, which may require an aptitude test and interview.

The result is that you ensure true commitment to the job. Mr Jari Kouvalainen, a student teacher at the University of Eastern Finland, said: “Because we have to get through this really hard test, you have to be really motivated. With another five years of study, you’re really committed to this career”.

RESEARCH-BASED TRAINING

In the ’70s, Finnish officials moved teacher training under the universities, subsequently implementing a five-year master’s degree programme for all who want to become teachers. A combination of theory, practice and research was key to teacher education, they decided.

Class teachers major in the educational sciences and teach most subjects including Mathematics and Science at the primary levels. Teacher educators say that teaching younger children requires strong pedagogical skills to motivate and excite learners, and not just the transfer of academic knowledge at this stage.

By contrast, subject teachers major in their teaching subjects, while also having to complete pedagogical modules and teaching practicums. In-depth knowledge in their teaching areas is crucial, to give them the confidence to explain complex theories and tackle difficult questions.

Ms Anneli Rautiainen, head of professional development of teachers at the Finnish National Board of Education, thinks that research-based teacher education accounts for the high quality of teaching in Finnish schools today.

“The fact that we have a Master’s degree for teacher initial education is very important. As research-based teachers, they can analyse learning situations and know how to support their students better,” she said.

Student teacher Ms Tuula Hurtig agrees that conducting research has honed her critical thinking abilities and improved her teaching methods. Graduating as a history and civics teacher this year, her thesis involved research into how historical pictures impacted her students’ learning.

GETTING FIELD EXPERIENCE

Head of teacher education at University of Helsinki, Professor Jari Lavonen, calls research-based teacher education vital — it combines with field practice to keep student-teachers in touch with classroom realities and “thinking about their teaching methods”, he said.

All student teachers undergo multiple teaching practicums as part of their five-year programme. Each one lasts between two weeks and a year.

Guided by teacher mentors, student teachers are attached to teacher-training schools set up by the universities, where they plan, teach and observe lessons. These 12 teacher training schools across Finland function as normal schools, with pupils coming from nearby homes. These schools also partner regularly with universities to produce the latest research in education.

Final-year student teacher Mikko Honkamaki, from the University of Jyvaskyla, worked with different mentors during each of his four practicuums — which broadened his perspective on various teaching styles — and got advice before and after each lesson. He also got to observe and critique fellow student-teachers, and vice-versa.

“Watching my peers forced me to focus on my own way of giving instructions ... Receiving and giving feedback has also been crucial to my growth as a professional,” he said.

LEEWAY TO DECIDE

It was a cold winter’s morning when TODAY visited Maininki School in Espoo city, half an hour outside Helsinki, and Ms Rose-Marie Mod-Sandberg was conducting an English Language lesson with her eight-graders (Secondary 2 equivalent).

The classroom was quiet as some students had fallen ill; it was a smaller than usual group. Ms Mod-Sandberg, 55, decided to get her pupils to share about their favourite American cities and imagine what they would do if they got there. As the mood lightened, she gave out worksheets which each student completed on their own.

She has the leeway to tailor her lessons according to her students’ abilities or interests on that very day itself, she told us. For instance, if the children were keen on a topic that was meant only for next year, she could dive into it. And if they seemed more tired than usual — such as after a strenuous Physical Education lesson — she could choose to do something less demanding, and pick things up later.

“If I want to teach a topic, I can teach it anyway and anytime I like,” she said. “Finnish teachers undergo a long training, so (school leaders) can trust us to be professional and to act in the pupils’ interest”.

MORE THAN MONEY’S WORTH

In Finnish schools, teachers typically teach from 8am to 2pm before heading off to plan lessons or attend to parents’ queries. They are not required to take charge of after-school activities such as arts or sports clubs — usually run by private community organisations — and those who do so, are remunerated accordingly.

Schools leaders also said that a layer of stress is removed for teachers as there is no evaluation process linked to their salaries. In fact, the pay structure is relatively flat where pay increases with years of experience and teaching hours.

According to the latest OECD data, Finland’s average annual wage is S$59,852 or approximately S$5,000 a month. For those teaching at the primary level, annual salaries start at S$35,883 (about S$ 3,000 a month). After 20 years, their pay reaches a maximum level of S$64, 530 (S$5,400 a month).

Nevertheless, pay is not a main issue for Finnish teachers, said those TODAY spoke to. People are attracted to the career due to the high status that education is accorded in Finland and the autonomy given to teachers.

The government provides free education in the first nine years of a child’s school life, while schools receive funds to invest in slower learners. Teachers also hold a place in Finnish history, often cited as important figures alongside priests and doctors.

“Young people still see working as a teacher as very creative and independent, where teachers can make a difference in their pupils’ lives,” said Mr Olli Maatta, a teacher trainer at Helsinki Normal Lyceum, a regular Finnish school owned by the University of Helsinki for trainee teachers to serve their attachments.

At Haagan Comprehensive School, the school bell rings and children burst out of their classrooms into the snow-filled courtyard, throwing snowballs at one another and sledding down mini snow hills.

Starring out of his window as one of his teachers leads pupils back from a skiing lesson, principal Mr Koivusalo observes: “The role of an educator is very important. If a teacher loves his job, the children know it and they will want to come to school.”


(Sidebar)
TEACHERS IN FINLAND
TRAINING
• Five-yer programme leading to a master’s degree
• Class teachers major in educational sciences, subject teachers in their respective subjects
• Multiple teaching practicums
• Research thesis

SALARIES
• Finland’s average annual wage: S$59,471
• Starting pay for class teachers: S$36,013
• Maximum pay: S$49,254
• Starting pay for subject teachers: S$38,894 to 40,041
• Maximum pay: S$53,195 to S$56,294

TEACHING FORCE
• Comprehensive schools (Grades One to Nine): 40,000
• Upper secondary schools: 8,000

AGE PROFILE OF COMPREHENSIVE SCHOOL TEACHERS
• 40 and below: 32%
• 40 – 49: 33%
• 50 and above: 35%

Source: OECD 2010 Data, Finland Ministry of Education and Culture


Ng Jing Yng is a senior reporter with TODAY covering the education beat. She spent one and a half weeks visiting schools in three Finnish cities — Helsinki, Jyvaskyla and Turku — ranging from primary through to upper secondary (JC equivalent) levels. She spoke to students, educators, university faculty who train teachers and officials.

Saturday, March 2, 2013

符合“好爸爸指数”就是好爸爸吗?

文章标题:符合“好爸爸指数”就是好爸爸吗?
文章作者:沈裕生
发表日期:2013年2月25日
发表媒体:《联合早报•言论》

  本地一个非营利组织计划今年推出一项“好爸爸指数”,以量化指标衡量身为人父者,在养育子女过程中是否投入足够多的精力。这一组织的负责人说:“爸爸扮演的角色到底如何,最终总要有个衡量标准,比如每天、每月或每年陪伴孩子的时间长短。当然,标准也不能单是陪伴孩子的时间,还应包括爸爸与孩子一起参与了什么活动等其他标准。”这样的一个“好爸爸指数”到底能发挥什么作用,实在令笔者感到非常怀疑。

  首先,这个指数的一个很大的毛病就是只衡量行动,但却不衡量行动所产生的效果。这跟教育部在评估学校的品格教育做得好不好有同样的问题,只是看学校做了多少,但是却没有衡量行动之后的效果怎样。结果,学校可以获得了教育部学校奖励计划总蓝图(MOE Masterplan of Awards for Schools)的最高荣誉奖——卓越学校奖(School Excellence Award),但是学生的品格仍然没有得到很大的改善。

  参与该计划的其中一位负责人举了其中一个“好爸爸指数”的例子,就是陪孩子上学。我们必须问,陪孩子上学的意义何在?只是为了陪孩子吗?或者是为了增进父子感情吗?或者是还有更高的意义和价值?甚至我们还必须问,陪孩子上学会产生负面价值吗?比如,许多有车阶级的人士天天载孩子上学,孩子却把父亲的这个举动当成理所当然,一点感激心都没有,而且还养成了一种惰性;有一天,父亲没有空载他的时候,他可能会很抗拒搭巴士。父亲天天载孩子上学,造成孩子舒服惯了、方便惯了而抗拒搭巴士;这样一个符合“好爸爸指数”的标准的父亲,可以算是好爸爸吗?

  其实,身为父亲,当我们跟孩子在一起从事任何活动的时候,我们的目的不纯粹只是为了陪孩子或增进感情,也不只是为了让孩子开心,更加不是为了活动而活动,而是为了教育他,令他的生命质素得到提升。

  所以,“好爸爸指数”如果只是停留在衡量父亲做了多少规定的活动,而不去考虑活动的结果,这将给许多人错误的印象,以为自己已经是好爸爸了、够好了,可以不用改进了;最后受害的将会是孩子。

  “好爸爸指数”的另外一个毛病,是只看到父亲与孩子相处的责任,但是没有看到父亲要为孩子树立榜样的责任。身为父亲,我们要为孩子树立什么样的榜样?孝顺、诚实、坚强、勇敢、勤劳、积极、谦虚、节俭、好学、稳重、大方、善良、有信用、有礼貌、有责任感、有正义感等等。这些做人的质素怎么衡量?

  另外,“好爸爸指数”也忽略了父亲教育孩子的责任?身为父亲,我们应该灌输孩子什么价值观、什么做人的道理?不二过、克己复礼、反求诸己、见义勇为、当仁不让、自强不息、和而不同、群而不党、兼善天下、先行其言而后从之、忧道不忧贫、知其不可而为之等等。

  其实,身为父母,我们对孩子都是有许多期望的。我们希望孩子以后做人规规矩矩,有个美满的家庭,稳定的收入,甚至对社会有一些贡献等等。所以,如果我们的孩子长大后作奸犯科,家庭破裂,三餐吃不饱,变成社会的负担,我们可以说自己是好爸爸、好妈妈吗?显然不是。问题是,如何才可以达到这些目标呢?完成“好爸爸指数”所规定的种种活动就可以了吗?显然也不是。

  其实,以上所列出的期望,都跟我们如何做人很有关系。我们懂得关怀人吗?懂得体谅人吗?懂得反省自己吗?我们有眼光吗?有深度吗?有远见吗?有承担力吗?有志气吗?有魄力吗?

  所以到最后,想成为“好爸爸”,我们不能不谈谈我们要为孩子树立什么榜样,和教育孩子什么做人的道理。问题是,人格世界与道理世界都是非常广大的世界,说之不尽,学之不完。孔子每十年生命都有一个大突破,到了七十岁才学到“随心所欲不逾矩”。可见,生命成长是一种终生的学习,没所谓毕业,没所谓完成责任。

  不过,以笔者对生命的了解,在众多的做人的道理之中,最关键的是要活得像一个“人”。根据已故文化学者唐君毅先生的说法,“人”是一种不断追求更高价值的存在;意思就是,人必须不断地提升自己的生命质素,以便令自己的生命能发挥更高的价值,到死方休。也就是说,做人最重要要做的一件事就是“自强不息”。这跟古老的《易经》里所描述的“天”的精神是一致的。

  “自强不息”就是要自动、自发,不断地自我反省、自我成长。人如果能有“自强不息”的精神,不管他的人生的现阶段有什么缺点、弱点、不足、局限,只要给他时间,他都能慢慢地一一克服,慢慢地走向成贤、成圣的方向。只有这样,父母才不需要一直担心孩子的问题;只有这样,孩子才算真正的独立;只有这样,才能保证人有美好的将来。

  所以,父母必须先有这种“自强不息”的精神,然后把这个最重要的做人的精神,尽早传授给我们的孩子。总的来说,人生是一个不断学习(生命成长义)和付出的过程;没有最好,只有更好。